I have been reading some eloquently written blogs by new widows. So expressive, but oh, so sad. It is true you feel absolutely alone at the beginning of this forever journey and it is amazing how similar the thoughts and writings are to each other, and to my own perceptions of almost 2 years ago. One thought, tho...and I would never share this with another "new " widow, is my surprise at how that feeling of loss and aloneness does not change in it's depth. Months of sadness-22.

Michael W. Smith - Ancient words

Three things happened today that I find so very interesting and worthy of pondering. First, Kerri Sperling spoke of her trip to Africa this fall, and finished with the thought that where we are is where the grass is greenest---flourish where we are planted for the moment is how I interpret her words (thanks Kerri, you are such a blessing to all who know you). Words, yes...but wait!

Next came the singing of the song Ancient Words by Michael W. Smith, posted here as well. During the singing, I could hear the bagpipes being played, in fact, I looked around to find them...but no, they were not physically in the church. Hmmm, pipes along with the words--truly meaningful to me. I love to think of the Bible as ancient words, not a mystery, but truly the wisdom from ages past. More pondering...and then...

Delaney has a friend over to play. As they look up some information on the computer, friend says to D..."You know the card we got at your dad's funeral? Well, I have one, and that means I won't forget your dad" and they laugh and carry on like kids, and I cry (I've been doing that a lot these days, not sure why, doesn't matter tho', I just do).

So, 3 things....flourish where we are planted now, look to the ancient words for wisdom and praise to God for those words, and appreciate where we are planted right now for Delaney's sake, as well as my own.

In keeping with my today's thoughts, pictures are going back up on the walls here, and more house decorating plans are in order. Happy 2011.

As I browse Blogger, I am reminded how serious blogging is to some out there, and I realize a blogger, I am not! When I write papers, I have to search for words--if I say it once, then I am done with the thought. Not like many speakers, who say the same thing over and over again, tho' they may repeat the thought in different words, kind of like preaching. I do notice my impatience with others when many of those vocal folk like to repeat what has already been said in their own words. ANNOYING! So, I see my thoughts of any particular day being like this---got up, had coffee, did this and that, and blah, blah, blah...See what I mean? Nothing to say, and really now, who cares what my day involved. So I am going to quit fretting about this blog, write when I feel the need, and not call myself a blogger. The question remains, tho'--now that I know I am not a blogger, what DO I want to be when I grow up?